Parties, Travel

Bachelorette Party in St. Maarten

When my cousin May (often referred to as ‘sister’) gave me a card during a recent visit to LA I had no idea what it could be for. I pulled it out of its envelope. SH*T JUST GOT REAL it read.St Maarten Bachelorette Party_1

And on the interior: Will you be my bridesmaid?

I squeeeeealed! I’d never been asked to be anyone’s bridesmaid before. She likes me, she really likes me! My entire life I’ve waited for this validation from my younger and always cooler cousin. She had been the glue that pulled my DIY wedding together back in 2006— literally— tacky-gluing programs and place cards hours before I walked down the aisle. Finally I can reciprocate.

Lucky for me, she’s not a hardcore DIY-er.

So far, the only duty I’ve been burdened with is attending a bachelorette party in the Caribbean. It was really really really hard to leave LA, folks. Really hard to leave amidst the chaos of end-of-the-year everything at two different schools, really hard to take a 5-day vacation— the first I’ve taken since having children. Really hard.


This was also my first bachelorette party. Ever. So it was a bit of a cultural experience. And like all cultural experiences I partook with enthusiasm. If you’re interested in the dark side, you can read about my existential conflict here.

As for the Suitable for Work St. Maarten Travel Brochure read on!St Maarten Bachelorette Party_2

I met May and her friend Maggie at JFK and we flew to St. Maarten together. I never even asked “why?” regarding these rubber masks. I just accepted them as a “why not” from the start. They fit right in to the surreal, fantastical environment of this Caribbean adventure. And, I have always wanted to be a unicorn.St Maarten Bachelorette Party_3

Three hours later we landed in paradise.St Maarten Bachelorette Party_4

We rented a beachfront house May’s maid of honor Mel found on VRBO. I think I paid $140 for three nights. Steal.St Maarten Bachelorette Party_5

You know you’re staying on the dutch side of St. Maarten when the sea glass is broken Heineken bottles.St Maarten Bachelorette Party_6

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We spent the first night in Marigot, French side, and had an amazing dinner at Rosemary’s.St Maarten Bachelorette Party_

Seeing these cuties made me miss my girls. But I worked through it. The bachelorette party must continue!St Maarten Bachelorette Party_9

Caption this.

“You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

“Shoot. These lips and lashes are for another, Boo.”St Maarten Bachelorette Party_10

It’s too bad the people of St. Maarten have zero personality. We were so bored.St Maarten Bachelorette Party_11

The next day we lounged. I read Gone Girl. Perfect reading material while celebrating someone else’s pending nuptials.St Maarten Bachelorette Party_12

This drove me nuts. But eventually wrote it off as #caribbeanproblems.  (Seriously though, a plastic thing to fit in the casing? Something?)St Maarten Bachelorette Party_13

Clearly I wasn’t there yet. I needed help relaxing.St Maarten Bachelorette Party_14

Participating in more of our favorite beach pastimes.St Maarten Bachelorette Party_15

At night we hit the town.St Maarten Bachelorette Party_16

The view from the top… of the bar. Gotta admit, the French bartenders defied all stereotypes. They were friendly, generous and seemed to be having as much if not more fun than their customers. (If anyone knows the name of this place I”ll link to it.)St Maarten Bachelorette Party_17

The hour when strange men and kleptomania start creeping in…St Maarten Bachelorette Party_18

Just as we started to settle into island life… it was over.St Maarten Bachelorette Party_19

Thanks for an amazing trip, ladies.

May, I hope you enjoyed burying your maidenhood. I sure enjoyed digging mine up and dusting her off.


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